Tidbits

I have bronchitis again. I blame it on boot camp. Last Thursday I was the first one to complete my sets and my runs. I just had a ton of energy. Apparently I pushed toooooo hard. I started coughing later that day and ended up at Occ Health today.

The kitten has found the dog's chewie and is proceeding to play with it as his own personal form of entertainment. They are getting along very well - there is much running, playful gnawing, butt sniffing...you know, the usual.

The parents are headed my way in a few days!!! I haven't seen them since December, so I can't wait to show them the Texas I now know. That Texas will involve wedding dresses this visit....will I find the one? Who knows!

DH and I spent the weekend curled up watching movies and intermittently doing bushels of laundry, mainly his. He introduced me to Up, I introduced him to How to Train Your Dragon, we watched This Is War, The Hudsucker Proxy, Forgetting Sarah Marshall and half of The Grey.

Just a few tidbits...now I have the 4th Outlander book to go finish.

Ten Fifteen

For the last three years I've been working on losing the same ten - fifteen pounds. Seriously? Seriously. I have run 3 half marathons. I have worked out up to 5 times a week. I have changed my eating habits, both in when, what and how much I eat. Right now I'm doing a boot camp.

Am I destined to be this size forever? And I don't mean that in a "I can't be happy where I am" way. Just an honest question. I may never lose this last 10 - 15 pounds. No one else may ever notice it or give it a second thought, but to me it's a failure.

I have friends using the same tools I do that are dropping weight. I'm so happy for them but totally jealous at the same time. It drives me crazy that I can't do the same. I feel like no matter the drive I have, the steps I take, the changes I make...I still end up right here. "Does that tree look familiar?" "We've been here before."

I really do not want to be the incredible flabby lady on my wedding night. Those dresses hide a lot, but there's no hiding once the dress is gone and life goes back to normal. I used to wish I had been born in the civil war era because those dresses and hoops hid any size badonkadonk without trouble.

I dream of a day when I look in the mirror and am happy with what I see. I want to not worry about how my butt looks in those jeans or whether my calves are too big (darn zippered boots keep reinforcing that one...). I'm scared I will never get there and then I'll get pregnant some day and the pounds will roll on and never leave. I worry that there's nothing I can do or try to lose the weight. Even if it's "only" 10-15 pounds.

Thanks Shell for letting me say what I'm scared to.

A Listicle

I've been looking for the perfect Listicle to get into for a while. I love the ideas of lists for blog posts because you have a guide. Otherwise I kind of roam from thought to thought and it doesn't feel very coherent at all.

This Listicle is perfect because hindsight is 20/20, right?  Courtesy of the Good Life, here are 10 Things A Husband Should Do. I'm hoping to come back to this topic post-nuptials and see how off base I am!

1. Support Me When I Am Justified
Occasionally....well, a lot.....I voice my opinion on matters at hand. Sometimes they're not necessarily matters at my hand, but that generally doesn't stop me from adding in my 25 cents. It's never 2 cents. I hope that DH will support me when I am justified in my opinion and not play devil's advocate without cause and without warning.

2. Reel Me Back Into Reality When I've Lost My Everlovin' Commonsense
Just as I hope he will continue to support me, I pray that he will proverbially bring me back to earth when needed. Sometimes I get really worked up and need him to say "Babe, calm down. It's not that important." Because a lot of the time, it's not that important and I'm really upset because my pride is hurt. It's not his job to support me at all costs when I'm clearly way off point.

3. Keep An Emergency Hangry Stash
I saw this on Pinterest, and it is so freakin' appropriate it's ridiculous. Many, MANY people in my life will tell you hangry is real and I can be the epitome of it.

DH has learned to roll with the punches regarding my hangriness. I'm pretty good about being able to say "If I don't get something to eat soon I will be pretty cranky". The best part is that he can anticipate it sometimes and will grab me a drink or a snack before I even know I need one. I heart him so much for that. Although I know it's also about his self-preservation...don't poke me when I'm hangry.

4. Continue To Be Sweet To All Living Things
Because if I see the bug, he's getting squished. DH on the other hand will find whatever he needs to get the bugs outside and alive. He stops traffic to rescue birds in the street and seems supremely disappointed when I stomp on the spider instead of inquiring about where it would like to live out the rest of it's days. I'm gonna need someone to teach the future Wee Ones that they don't have to kill the bugs and how to rescue the hurt animals.

5. Take Out The Trash
When I was in high school I worked in a small corner store. It was part of the job to change the garbage cans and take the bags to the dumpsters. I cannot tell you how many times I stuck my hand into something gross when changing the bags. I will gladly regulate the garbage chore to DH come next April.

6. Tell Me How Beautiful I Am To Him
I don't care if anyone else thinks I'm beautiful or caring or sweet. I only care that he sees me more clearly than I see myself and he tells me what he sees on a daily basis, as he does now. Wow, that sounds stuck up....I mean that it's important to tell each other what we mean to one another. DH does an amazing job of trying to open my eyes to my true worth and beauty as he sees me. I have a hard time looking at myself and seeing the good instead of all the human flaws that are co-existing. I pray I can do the same for him.

7. Wash The Cars
He's not about to let me get near his car - a nifty little beamer - so this automatically falls into his category. What the heck is a clay bar? Clearly I should not be allowed to clean automobiles.

8. Cook Dinner On A Regular Basis
DH loves to cook. I am very lucky. I also love to cook. DH is very lucky. And it's not just man food that he cooks. He likes to cook together and try new recipes. This is a godsend to both of us since he works until 5 and I work until 6. If he never cooked/didn't know how to cook/expected me to cook then we'd never eat sooner than 7 or 7:30.

9. Sharing Vacuum Duty
We plan on having a dog and two cats. That all equals a lot of hair. I do not want to walk out of the house in the morning with pet hair on me. I also don't want people to visit and wonder if they will leave covered in hair. So vacuuming will need to happen on a pretty regular basis.

10. Take Time For Himself
DH loves to play video games. He doesn't do it every night or for hours on end usually. It's important for him to have time to do what he loves without feeling like I'm hovering and waiting for him to be "productive". We all need time to recharge and take time to do the things we love without our spouse. If it's something they enjoy too, then that's even better. But it doesn't have to be.

Whew....this Listicle thing is more difficult that I thought! I hope y'all have fun snickering at your computer screens and thinking "She's so sweet. Bless her heart. Just wait until they get married." Find a Listicle and join in the fun!

 

Now Join Hands, and with Your Hands Your Hearts

What I've learned in the last couple weeks is that getting married would be so much easier if we lived in Shakespeare's time. We join hands and hearts...I totally had a flashback of the Kellerman's talent show from Dirty Dancing, anyone else? Anyway, we join hands and hearts. Bam. Married. Maybe we should become handfast? Neither of us are Scottish but maybe we can fake it?

A wise friend told me right after DH and I were engaged that weddings are emotional affairs. Someone will get their feelings hurt, no matter how hard you try to avoid it. So we've decided to not focus on sparing feelings but to focus on what we want. I don't mean that selfishly, but in a loving way. We have to keep our eye on what the marriage means and what our wedding will mean to us.

It's really hard to do that. There are so many things that begin to swirl in your head and you begin to think that everyone else needs to be happy and you forget that this day is just that - a day. It's not important in the grand scheme. The marriage is the important thing.

Still, I'm having difficulty not wanting to make everyone else happy, to not hurt anyone else's feelings, and to not be so overwhelmed that I can't enjoy my engagement.

Thanks Shell, even if I'm late, for letting me pour my heart out.

Just for You, Mom

Mom A, just for you....a double rainbow.
Happy Mother's Day from your little (grown-up) girl.

Madness

I haven't disappeared, y'all. Just sucked into wedding planning madness. I'll return to sanity shortly, I hope. We're close, fingers crossed, to finding a venue and caterer. That will make all the difference in the world!

Cruisin' and Moving Full Sail Ahead

DH and I went on a cruise. I was a little nervous considering I cannot do more than tread water for a few seconds. I made him promise me that should we pull a Titanic...or a Costa Concordia, for that matter, that he would get me in a life boat with a life jacket on. I am a nervous traveler. I am convinced that I will miss my flight, forget my ID, lose my passport, leave my underwear at home, get pull over by security and be allowed into a country but not back out. Irrational traveling fears for the most part.

After we got under way, I was more amazed by the dolphins swimming along with us, the way the ocean changes colors and how freakin' huge the ship was. I was a little seasick the whole time. It was the worst when sitting still. Laying in the sun was fine, walking was fine. Whatever plane of gravity my head resides in when sitting was NOT fine. But the cruise line does their best to keep your stomachs full in an effort to distract you from the seasickness.

The ports that we stopped in were Progresso - kind of dirty - and Cozumel - I could live there. Cozumel was the only thing that DH wanted....white sands, crystal clear water and floating water toys. We had a great time!

While we were on the cruise DH surprised me with a proposal to spend the rest of our lives together. It was a beautiful night! We were alone on one of the lower decks and he had snuck the ring into his camera case without me being any the wiser. I wish I had a picture from right after but they're all on his camera. It was the perfect proposal for us. Then I kind of wanted to run through the cruise ship shouting "I'm getting married!!!!" But I didn't. Instead we went to a wine bar for champagne, held hands and giggled, had a round of champagne bought for us when we told the family next to us what had happened, went to a piano bar and DH broke two chairs. That's a different story completely...

It's so bright! The sun, the SUN!!!!

Pre-proposal

He needed a little captain's courage, I guess...

"Would you say I have a plethora of pinatas?"

Eric's deep blue sea

Leaving Cozumel....tanned and happy

Dinner the last night...we didn't get pictures with our fourth couple =(

Now we're moving full speed sail ahead. It's all venues, caterers, dresses, pastors, flowers, photography....it's never ending at the moment. But a happy kind of never ending.